What is that Smell ?

 WTF is that terrible smell ?  Yesterday I got into my elevator and there was an elderly man with his wife who had gotten off at the same time I got in.  The elevator door closed and I nearly died from the smell. I was fucking trapped and all I thought about was fresh air.
    I began to get dizzy and a little nauseous and immediately thought it was barf time. I was able to control myself and eventually got out of the elevator alive and in one piece.

Now, however I must ask a very simple question. Why is it that mostly real old people wear the cheapest perfume or cologne made ?  It is like the old bottles of Thunderbird wine we used to buy for $1.99 a gallon that was barely drinkable.  We drank it however, because it was a necessity and we didn't have enough money for anything better.

       These people that I am speaking about are not poor. We are not talking about lower class, mid income folks watching every penny.  These are people who have retired here in So. Florida, and are driving their Bentley's and other luxury cars. These are people that have more money to burn and don't worry about a thing..................except of course when they buy their fragrances.  The men all seem to buy something like a quart size of Canoe or one of those other cheap colognes that have a smell that lasts for days and covers at least a half mile radius.

       The women seem to use something different that surely does not smell sweet, but has some old death like smell to it. In any event, it is disgusting.

       It's reached a point that some of the medical offices here in Florida have signs requesting patients to refrain from wearing anything due to the fact some people are allergic to certain colognes.  That is such a nice way of saying that some people really stink and are not welcome in the office.

      
Somehow, however,  I seem to believe that she (left) will smell really wonderful being right next to her. And yes, I certainly would like to be right next to her.
















     I do have a solution for this smelly crap.  In fact I have two solutions........First of all as pictured below is to simply buy a nice modern day gas mask to carry around at all times.

          The second and probably better idea is to get the fuck out of Florida.

Hey........check out the Crap Cap on the right and buy a cap or two........thanks...you will love it aside from having fun with it.