Supermarket Shopping Slobs (This is a Summer Re-run from The Worst of Crap.

I went food shopping at Publix earlier and noticed something I have seen lots of times but never saw fit to write about.  I am also sure that each and every one of you have experienced the same thing at one time or another.  Yup, it's that ugly older man or woman that has to touch everything they buy.  They have to open up a carton of eggs and look at each and every egg in the carton, and usually go through 3 or 4 eggs cartons before they are either satisfied with those 12 little bitty eggs, or have developed a true friendship with them in the time they spent putting their disgusting, dirty, smelly, ugly hands on each and every egg.  How many of us have purchased that carton they put back and had no knowledge of it ?  It really sucks that egg cartons do not have electronic tazers built in to protect the eggs from such abuse.  I however do not keep quiet when I see this happening.  I will confront that person and really give them some shit.  Sort of like yelling at a driver when you get cut off.  It certainly does make you feel better.
     But that is not the end of it.  Follow this same person to the produce section and you with see the same thing.  They will examine every tomato or piece of fruit like they were going to adopt it.  They will hold it, squeeze it, smell it, and whatever, again with those disgusting, dirty, smelly, ugly hands. If I owned a supermarket, I would have snipers with tazer guns stationed in that department.  What fun it would be zapping these people.
     I certainly realize there is a bit of touching that needs to be done.  I also realize there are exceptions to every rule and some of these people are just that.  Recently I caught a women eating blueberry's from the container and then putting it back on the shelf.  Boy did I have fun telling her where to go.  Where are the Produce Police when you need them ???
     I guess it goes deeper than that.  It has to do with consideration to others.  I guess it is really a lost art.  I guess I will have to be careful when I go shopping and open a box of cookies to eat while I do my shopping.  What makes what I do different is the fact that I don't put it back, but politely finish the cookies and then throw the box away.  I mean the stores should provide some light snacks while I am shopping.  Free samples are wonderful.