Un-Supermarkets

Most of us go to one. Most of us have one or two right in their local area. I am sure that if you are like me, the one near you is part of some gigantic local chain that has a branch almost everywhere you spend most of your time.  I know that I am at my local supermarket at least 3-4 times per week and that each and every time is a new and unique experience.  Here in South Florida we have Publix which has about 1000 stores.  It seems like they are all located every 3 blocks in my area.

     For the most part, they are nice upscale stores that are competitively priced and very clean. OK, so you really think I am going to continue talking about the good things ? Hell No.......... Let's get down to serious business starting from getting out of my car and trying to avoid a runaway shopping cart that is heading towards me.  I'm sure I am not the only one plagued by the selfish son of a bitches that are too lazy to return the cart, but feel compelled to leave them wherever the fuck they feel like. These are the same people that never get their car dented, but manage to do it to someone else's.

       So here I am entering the store and getting a nice clean shopping cart.  Ha, ha, ha.  There is no way they are clean, and almost always there is some paper, tissue, candy wrapper, or some other useless shit in the cart.  I have now taken a clean wipe that is conveniently located by the carts and have cleaned my cart to avoid germs or the plague.  ( Do you remember when the stores cleaned these ? )
     Now comes the really good part. Deciding which aisle to go down first.  I usually pick the produce and fresh deli and bakery aisle which is usually at one end in all these stores.  They used to have a nice bakery department with freshly baked breads, cakes, and everything.  In fact, they had live people working behind the counter then.....NOPE.....no more......everything is lying on tables in those stupid plastic molded containers.  It not only looks like shit, but no longer is that wonderful bakery smell present.........Now to look at some nice fruit and veggies in the produce section.  Oh, guess what ???? most of the fruit and vegetables are pre-packaged in cellophane .  No longer are they lying loose for me to choose what I want.  Actually, I am not telling the entire truth.  The Tomatoes and a few other things are still loose. .......Now to the Deli department where you can buy all the unhealthy processed meats and cheese you want.  This is still behind glass and a happy employee will gladly slice whatever you want and give you a sample as well.....But.....I repeat.....But......where are the fresh salads, the freshly made tuna and other salads , the specialty dishes, the chopped liver, the cucumber salad, the rice puddings, and all those other good things ????? They are not there. Gone.... They are now in some case across from the counter in plastic containers all pre-packaged.  OMG, we are living in a world of Lazy.....Everything seems to be done for us to make our lives easier..... I hate it.  I want real people. I want a live person giving me the salads or whatever I want fresh. I also know this is never going to happen again, at least not in a supermarket.

     So it is just busy, busy, busy, trying to manipulate my shopping cart around slow, lazy, inconsiderate, fat, sloppy, ugly, noisy, people also trying to shop.
      My dreams of running into shoppers like pictured below seem to be fading away, and my only salvation seems to be going back to the local gourmet market that is completely wonderful, but costs about twice as much......What is a guy to do ????

    

Where have all the Appetizers and Deli's Gone??????????????

Florida really sucks. In fact everyplace sucks outside of NY if your looking for a good appetizer or Deli. Sure, they call them one of these names, but you know it just is not the same, nor will it ever be the same.  Anyone from NY  (That's the city and not to be confused with the Bronx, Brooklyn, Queens, or that other funny borough ) knows there is nothing that can or ever will duplicate Russ & Daughters, Zabars, Murray's, Barney Greengrass, Katz's, Second Ave Deli and a few others here and there.  I intentionally left out Carnegie Deli as that has become really crap and touristy over these past years.  Anyone from the city would cringe going into one of the so called Deli's anywhere else.
     In So. Florida there is a chain called Toojay's that probably should be called Toshitty to eat.  Sure, there are a few places everywhere that can pass for a deli or an appetizer but lets face it.........It just is not the same..... It's not because I am a New Yorker, it is just plain and simple.... A bagel is a bagel is a bagel.....BUT.....only if it is made in NY........  Rye bread for a sandwich is rye bread.......but again.....not the same unless it is made in NY...... (OK LA, there are a few good bakeries there). 
      My point is not to bring out how great these few places are in NY, but to figure out WTF this sort of thing cannot be done in Florida, or Georgia, or Kansas or wherever???????? You don't have to be Jewish to eat this.  ( Although it probably does help somewhat).

      There is absolutely no point to any of this.  It's the mere fact that I have been thinking of a great pastrami sandwich these past few days as well as a great bagel with cream cheese and lox......Sure....I can get it here, but some things are just not the same.....I have no problem with copy cats, but shouldn't they be good ????  If you were buying a knock-off of a famous expensive designer you would expect it to be perfect, otherwise everyone of your friends would know that it was a knock-off and you would not be able to live with yourself......Well, that is exactly what I expect from these jerk off places that have the balls to call themselves a Deli or an Appetizer......