Boobs of the Day

I was hoping that today would be one of those simple days where everything would go nice and easy.  Well in my messed up life that never seems to happen.  I have been expecting some business cards that I ordered for CRaPUSA about now.  I really needed them for the preparations of the Cynical Ridiculous and Pathetic upcoming TV show, and projected movie.  And if you believe that ??????

      Anyway, I ordered some business cards exactly 2 weeks ago from a company called Overnight Prints on line. I guess the name alone should have been a red flag that I was about to get screwed.  I looked at my account on line this morning and noticed the cards have not been printed as yet, and not scheduled to print until next Monday. Then of course they would be shipped by ground.

I remember initially ordering them and seeing it would be about 14-21 days to receive them.. I had ordered cards from this company before and knew that it was always shipped sooner. So I did what any red blooded person would do........Resort to calling their hot line and knowing I would have to speak to a real person.  I hate speaking to real people because they are always so fucking stupid and do nothing but read from some scripted menu that is in front of them. But, there was no alternative as there was no option on their web site.
      I am pleasantly greeted by some nice sounding lady who I am sure was some 400 pound animal trainer in her past life.  She proceeded to sweet talk me and tell me how she would gladly check my order and help me with my problem.....OK, so now its already my problem and not the company who has not gotten around to print my little order.  She tells me exactly what I already saw on the site.  Naturally I question her as to why nothing has been done to my order yet.....Her reply was classic......Sir, she politely says.......you checked standard shipping on your order and it will be printed on Monday.  I said what about the 2 weeks it has been sitting there on business card vacation.....She said.....Sir there was a weekend during that time and a holiday as well.......I said , What does that all have to do with shipping ? She said.......If you had checked priority shipping your order would have been shipped by now.......That is when I stopped being nice....In other words said I with a fucking attitude, "Standard orders just sit on their ass until such time as all the priority orders are filled ????? "  From the silence on her end, I knew I hit the jackpot.
      So Fuck You, Mr Overnight Prints....No more orders from me.........But I should have known better. Its like living in a home on Lakefront Drive.....You know there is no lake visible.

        Thanks for the bullshit lies and deception in your name.....Overnight Prints.



for easy shopping please go to zazzle.com/crapusa