TV Logo's Suck (from the worst of crap.....April 2010)

I Hate TV Logo's.  In fact, I sometimes turn off something I am watching if they have that stupid ridiculous logo on the bottom right of the screen. Did every idiot working on a major TV station decide on the same day to put their ugly logo on the screen so that every viewer can be annoyed at the same time looking at this ????
    OK, I realize these upper management jerks want to advertise their station.  But give me a f***en break.  If it's a regular station there are certainly enough commercials to pay for this. If it's a cable station, there are certainly enough viewers paying to watch the station.
     My question is simple.  Why??? But not only why???? Why so damn large ?  Even I would probably not mind a tiny little logo in a monotone color on the screen.  ( OK, maybe that is a lie ). But to put these hideous, colorful, letters with logos in plain site............give me a break..... Oh, and while I am ranting and raving about the logos, what about those stupid trailers for a new show that also come popping out ?  This whole thing is so annoying.  Sometimes I just put the PIP on my TV just so I don't have to see the logo. That can be fun, but also annoying.

        I have googled some of this and see there are several law suits against the stations for doing just this. Don't think this is limited to TV's. Hey gang, look at your I phone or Blackberry when looking for something or on any free app and you will see ads and logo's there as well.  It will never stop.  I am waiting see a logo or an ad on the toilet paper the next time I change a roll.
     I put the computer system on in my car and what pops out first ?  Right......a damn Genesis Logo.  The same happened on my Jag.  What is next ? ? ? ?  You can't watch porn without a short ad coming on first.  Any news event video's on line have a quick ad first.  Turn on your Mac and a big friggen Apple pops up.....I am waiting to turn on my microwave one day and after punching in the settings, seeing a big GE logo before it goes on.

     I am tired of these stupid logo's..............by the way............subscribe to CRaP............ Is that large enough?????

Define Sexy ?????? Test Results to Follow

How do you define Sexy ????   Is it 1-2-or 3 above....................or is it something you actually never thought of ????????  Now that I have your attention.................you will have to wait a while.  Sorry, but a little brain freeze along the way, but it is coming........

Great Blow Jobs

I hate fucken leaf blowers. I don't really hate them, I merely hate the people using them. I hate the fact that there is no universal rule of ethics for using one of these machines. I hate the fact that no-one gives a shit where these leaves, sand, dirt, debris gets blown too.

     Leaf blowers are no longer just leaf blowers. They have taken on an entirely different job.  They currently clean parking lots, sidewalks, and area's where brooms are no longer used.  These machines are operated by a select group of little foreign men with a strange color green shirt, a ragged cap, and somewhere a beaten up truck with the words A1, George's, Al's, Best, etc. Landscaping.............These people operating this simple hand held machine run by smelly and usual gas leaking backpack attached have only a few purposes.  They are so fucken deafening, and capable of blowing whatever is in the way about 25 feet to nowhere.

          In case this isn't bad enough, or loud enough................something else is thrown into the equation.........You guessed it ??????  There are usually 3 or 4 Guatemalans doing the job that only requires one blower.  I know hookers that can blow more effectively and certainly much quieter.
But I do recognize the need for their job. I do understand that leaves need to be blown off the grass. I do understand that driveways, paths, sidewalks, and certain other area's need to be blown clean......
     What I don't understand is WHY these leaves and debris has to be blown into the street in traffic at usually the same time that I am going by ?????? If it is slightly windy these leaves and shit wind up all over the place anyway.  It is a back and forth game.
     Every once in a while, I get to beat these assholes at their own game.  On rare occasions I see them down the street blowing their leaves into the road from large piles......Ahhhhhhhh.......it's get even time to fucken little excuse for landscapers............I get ready.......I get in position......I tighten up my seat belt........I put the pedal to the metal and at 60 mph I get as close to the pile of leaves and try to blow them all over the place as I am passing. Hopefully I have not hit any of the leaf blowers, but that is simply collateral damage.

     Stop messing with me Mr. Leaf Blowers.

Will the real Dumbwaiter Please Stand ------Orig date June 2010

As you are about to discover, I really do not rant over everything ??????  Sometimes I like to remember the day, or as my son used to say "When stuff was in black and white",  I have been writing a book for almost 10 years now called Hubba Hubba, Growing up in the Bronx.  It will probably never ever be completed, but when I do sit to write a chapter, it really gives me a kick.  Maybe it's just for me, and maybe nobody else really gives a CRaP, but I don't care.
      Growing up in an apartment building in the Bronx and living most of my life in apartments, I have seen the many ways of disposing of garbage.  There used to be incinerators, chutes, cans in the halls, and one of the oldest and probably the best way to dispose of garbage......The Dumbwaiter.  I am going to take my dumwaiter tale from my book (that sounds nice) and put it right below.
     

The Dumbwaiter   (from Hubba Hubba)

NOW.  How did you get rid of the garbage?  The incinerator, the garbage room, the glad bags???? Give up????  The Dumbwaiter…No dummy, not someone who forgot your order this evening when you were out, but The Real Dumbwaiter. (spelled both ways )

A Dumbwaiter was a thing of beauty. A thing advanced for its time.  A futuristic way of collecting garbage. A totally unbelievable way of getting rid of your garbage. Are you convinced yet? I will now fill you in on this wonderful invention of the past.  Picture an area in the kitchen, or hallway will a small door about three feet off the floor, about 3 feet wide, and about four foot high.  It had a small handle, and about 5 PM each day, a bell of some sort would ring near that door.  That was your key to open the dumbwaiter, and look into a shaft with 2 big rope pulleys that were attached to what looked like 2 enclosed shelves in that opening.  Now picture most apartment buildings were 6 stories and the super was standing in the basement. Now, when the buzzer buzzed, or the bell rang, you only hoped that your mother was not there so you could do the garbage yourself. Naturally, your father was still at work.  Now, if you mother were there, she would open the door, and look to see if the shelves were straight ahead. If not, she would stick her head in the opening and look either up or down the shaft. She would then yell down to the Super… A little higher, or a little lower. Naturally, there were no lights inside the area, and the super had to pretty well judge the distance by himself.  When is got close, she would yell down…OK hold it.  She would then get the garbage that was only in a paper bag, and place it on the shelf. Then she would once again yell down to the super…. OK. The fun was then over and she would then lock the door to the shaft.   BUT, if you were lucky enough to have your mother in another room, or out for a while when the buzzer buzzed, you were in luck.  Why you may ask??? Because you were in control. You could open the door. You could yell down to the super “A little higher”, Then  “A little lower”, knowing good and well that you were lying every second and were going to drive the super crazy until he finally got the dumbwaiter in the right position. Your dream was to make him work for what you thought would be an hour. Unfortunately, your mother would hear the yelling no matter where she was, and put an end to it one, two, and three.  It usually meant some severe punishment, but it was always worth it.  Sometimes if you got really lucky, you were able to drop something off the dumbwaiter hoping it would hit the super. That never happened and growing up I was convinced that every super went to a special dumbwaiter ducking school and they all passed with flying colors. Another common trick all the kids tried was to spill a glass of water down the shaft while the dumbwaiter was on a floor or two higher.  Naturally, the kids on the high floors never had that opportunity.

   So that is my little tale of Dumwaiters and what is was like growing up in Black and White.