Saturday, May 14, 2016

I Love U Facebook........I Hate U Facebook


I love Facebook.  I love it so much, I'm ready to throw my computer out the window.  I can't decide if some of my friends of FB are Completely brilliant or are just the dumbest assholes I know ?  I am not sure if they believe some of the prayers they ask me to re-post, or simply have formed a new religion and are trying to recruit me.
        
I love Facebook. I think it's wonderful that a tool has arrived that refuses to let me forget anyone's birthday that is my closest friend, family member, or the local bartender who might be our friend.  It's wonderful being reminded and then feeling like a piece of shit when you forget anyway and see that person thanking everyone but you the following day.
I love Facebook.  I especially love seeing pictures of friends that I haven't seen in many years.  Usually I am able to recognize them.  Sometimes they are very well disguised.  Sort of looks like every real estate persons business card with a 20 year old picture of them on it.
    
I Love Facebook.  However, I'm convinced I might change my name to "Nobody"... This is just a perfect example of the many motivational posts that are made daily.  I can't stand those fucking posts telling me what I need to do to wind up in Heaven...Fuck You and your motivational shit...Post some good Rants that are perfect for your boring daily routine.  Don't try to motivate me.

    

 
I Love Facebook.......But please, please, please,  Keep your fucking political views to yourself.  There are some clowns that insist on posting stupid, uncalled for dumb shit about any politician or party they don't like.  This irritates me because it's just as bad as all the negative crap that goes on in any political race anyway.  Why can't we just be above that ?  It doesn't bother me, however, because I have already blocked those assholes.  
         
I Love Facebook.....Will someone please tell me where this button is ?  I would love one to be able to add it to someones post when they post every single thing they are doing that day ?  I don't care what your doing unless of course your going out to a show or dinner or something fun. Sure, it's nice to see what your up too. ?????  But I really don't give a fuck that you went to your refrigerator and got out a really nice ripe apple...Choke on it.
    
I Love Facebook......and I am so happy you have a dog or cat or some other strange kind of animal...But again, I don't give a shit what your pet eats for breakfast of that it's in bed with you. Hopefully it is shitting all over your bed now as you read this.
I Love Facebook.....but if your a real estate friend and decide to use Facebook to show your listings, or some other bull shit way to sell something, your blocked.  Get a work page on Facebook and stop boring your friends with your business.




I Love Facebook.......However, if I see one more picture of your ugly kid on a daily basis and what he is doing I am going to scream..Lock the kid up in the closet and let the rest of us enjoy the good things about Facebook....Whatever they may be....
   
I Love Facebook......If, however, you went out last night and had a wonderful affair, or some wild sex, and felt like posting pictures, along with giving graphic comment with views, suggestions, etc......please, please, please......Feel Very Free to share this with all your friends.  Now we are getting to the important stuff........
 

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